in half an hour or so, i will no longer be 29 years old. or rather, the meter will click over sometime tomorrow morning. close to 8am or close to 10am. at the moment, i cannot remember the time i’ve been told, and newborns rarely wear watches. 29 and holding? no. why do that? why tell yourself that time moves on without you? such logic serves only to deny opportunity and postpone hope.
and what about turning thirty? turning thirty? i am reminded of a use of the word “turn” familiar primarily to those of us who spent our formative junior high years rolling a 20-sided die and attempting to slay imagined dragons. as i remember it, turning was an act performed by a cleric, a spellcasting character who drew power from faith. turning was defence against the unwanted undead, and so you would roll your dice to determine if you had successfully turned (away) oncoming vampires and ghouls. so let’s say in that sense that i am not turning thirty, but rather welcoming it willingly and kindly.
from where i stand, thirty is not so important a benchmark as other ages. you look forward to 16 because that meant you could be licensed to legally drive. 18 brings adulthood in the eyes of the state, as well as the responsibility of voting and the uneasy application to selective service. the state recognizes your age again at 21, deciding that you may now consume and purchase alcohol. the only real first benchmark, at least to me, comes at 25. the quarter-century mark. man, now that phrase has some weight to it. you’re contemplating calculations in a scope of a hundred years.
but 30? no longer a quarter, not even a third. its really just a percentage, isn’t it?
“do you feel that life has passed you by?” i was asked this question just a few minutes ago, and my answer is an unyielding “no” — not a defensive statement, but one born of a deserved pride. i enjoy my work, working for a company i respect, making a positive contribution to the whole and surrounded by people i admire. i love my family, still as and even more supportive and loving as they have always been. my friends, they are wonderful and i could not ask for sweeter strings to weave into the tapestry of my human experience. thank you.
and i like me. with my faults and issues, my occasional successes and failures, my decisions wise and unwise, i am ever grateful for the next morning’s waking, even if i do need at least a cup of coffee to function properly.
at this moment i am 29 years old. in a short while, i will be 30 years old. at both points in the timeline, i will be who i am. and who i am considers where i will be a blessing.
